Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Understanding our role as adoptive parents

I have been trying to write this post for awhile, but I have been busy and then sick and I am just getting around to it! For a good part of this adoption process I have struggled with really feeling like we, as a couple, were needed for domestic newborn adoption. There are actually more couples waiting to adopt a newborn than there are babies being born. On the flip side however, as a couple we also felt for a long time that we weren't ready to adopt a child between the ages of 2-5 which is most common in international adoption and resulted in us choosing domestic newborn adoption. The past few weeks however, I feel like God has been hammering me over the head with the importance of domestic newborn adoption and where we as a couple are needed. Now, before you think I'm just flip-flopping back and forth between domestic newborn and international, I should state again that at this point, our paperwork is not finished for international and we are remaining open to both for the time being.

The past few weeks God has been stressing to me how important it is for couples to step up and support women who choose adoption rather than abortion for their babies. We need to be willing to step up at any time and say that we are willing to adopt these babies. Just like in international adoption, this could be the difference between life and death for a child. I truly believe that most women do not want to choose abortion, but they are scared and unfamiliar with the adoption process. They think that it will cost them too much, but they don't realize that it won't cost them anything, the adoptive parents cover all of the legal fees! They also don't realize that they are not "giving their baby up", they are placing their baby with a family that can care for that baby in a way that they can't at that point. They are in control of deciding what type of adoption they want, whether that be closed with no contact, some contact with pictures and letters or open to the point where they can visit their baby and be part of their child's life.

I know that abortion is a touchy topic, and I would never judge anyone who has had an abortion, but I think that everyone reading this blog probably knows where I stand. I also believe that there is a lack of education surrounding abortion and the emotional effects that it ultimately has not only on the mother, but the father as well.

Parents who choose to place their children for adoption are incredibly brave and deserve the utmost respect. They also deserve a community of people that will support them throughout their pregnancy and their decision to give their child life. I now understand that that is our role in domestic newborn adoption.

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