Tuesday, December 16, 2014

December is different this year

I don't even know if I will adequately be able to put into words all that we are thankful for this year. Last year, the holiday season came around and while it was a bit easier than the previous year, it also came with pain. I wrote last year how December marked my birthday, which for the past 5 years meant that I was another year older and still childless. Then Christmas, where everyone would post pictures on Facebook of their families with little ones experiencing the joy of Christmas through the eyes of a child. It was also a reminder that once again, we had no children to buy gifts for. And then the new year came and once again I was reminded that another year had passed and I was afraid to get my hopes up that this might actually be the year that we would become parents. Little did I know that days later I would get the email that would change our lives forever.

Now this year our lives are completely different. We have moved into a house, that we hope to someday buy, that actually feels like ours. It is small, but it is warm and cozy. It keeps us dry and shelters from all of the elements. It meets more than our basic needs and for us, it is perfect.

We are close to our parents which was a goal to meet before children came into our family, so that our children can know their grandparents the way Elias and I knew our grandparents growing up. It also gives Elias and I a chance to give back to our parents when possible (even though they continue to give us far more than we could ever give back to them).

And of course, we have these two new little lives in our family. Two little boys that have made us more exhausted than we could have ever imagined while filling our days with more joy and happiness than I ever thought possible. Two sweet babies that remind us just how good God is even when we are struggling and that He really does want good things for us, even if we have to wait for them. Two lives that make me more fully understand what it means to surrender my life and how to live more for Christ than for myself. Two little lives that help me better understand just how much God loves me, because I know that He loves me more than I could ever love them. Two little lives that make me feel like I am finally doing what God created me to do...be a mom. What an honor to be trusted to care for these two sweet babies!

With these two little boys, we are also thankful for the extended family we have gained through our birth family. We have another family that loves our boys just as much as we do.